


a love meant for yesterday

by momofsomeidiots



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Anxiety, Body Dysphoria, Confusion, Finding Love, M/M, Panic Attacks, feeling wrong in your skin, looking for love in the wrong places, someone to see you
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-08
Updated: 2021-02-08
Packaged: 2021-03-13 13:54:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 494
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29279547
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/momofsomeidiots/pseuds/momofsomeidiots
Summary: finding love is hard but finding a love that last to tomorrow is even harder
Relationships: Miya Atsumu/Sakusa Kiyoomi
Kudos: 15





	1. Chapter 1

epilogue

he was drowning. not literally of course, but it certainly felt that way. he felt the heaviness in his chest as if he was searching for air miles under the waters surface. his emotions dragged him into the depths, far lower than the eye could see. 

his eyes

the person who needed to see

they couldn't see the torment under their lovers skin

why couldn't they see

maybe that's why he left

perhaps that was why it was a love made for yesterday

but what of tomorrow's love

would they see

could their eyes see


	2. when beauty dies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the beginning
> 
> just a short update to get the story started. kiyoomi and ushijimas start-
> 
> we start to see sakusas character a bit more :)
> 
> honestly this is kinda the second epilogue to get things started but oh well we're gonna call it a chapter

his second year of high school kiyoomi knew he was a goner for ushijima. he was everything kiyoomi admired. a hard working, stoic guy whose strength was to be admired. by the end of that year he had gained the courage to confess and to his surprise the feeling was a mutual one.

  
the summer break was one to remember. the two soon found a rhythm to live by. dates one day, practice another, and in between quite days at one house or the others. it was simple, a by the book relationship if you had ever seen one.

that was until kiyoomi’s anxieties presented themselves. there were days he felt wrong, others he felt disgusted. while ushijima could show affection he never was one to understand deep feelings, how could he when he never had to deal with them himself. it started with days kiyoomi couldn't be around people including ushijima, and this brought arguments of why. why couldn't he? wasn't ushijima supposed to be a comfort to kiyoomi? was he not good enough for kiyoomi? sakusa didn't know these answers and pushed the questions aside. how could he explain the swirl of words in his mind or the actual disgust he felt of another's presence, even the presence of one he usually held dear. the relationship digressed as kiyoomi started to feel wrong in his skin. looking in the mirror became a rare occurrence. he no longer felt the beauty ushijima praised him for, nor did his body look right to him. ushi saw nothing wrong and couldn't always comprehend what he was to do at these times, not that kiyoomi knew what was going on either but tensions rose.

by the time kiyoomis third year started and ushiwaka was leaving for v league the relationship had strained to the point of no return. it ended on a warm summer day, not even two weeks into the new school year. they awoke together with the sun and seperate with the rise of the moon. it was an ugly fight, harsh words bottled up from confusion and discontentment thrown at each other. by the end of it throats were sore and tears ran rampant down cheeps. a love once beautiful had turned into a thing of nightmares. of course this is not where the story ends as this love was one made for yesterday but not tomorrow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi yes my brain works much faster than my hands can type and my ideas don't always present well on paper, any feedback is always welcome. i hope you enjoy the story. the idea came to me around 2 am one night so let's hope i can give it what it deserves

**Author's Note:**

> ahh this is my first time writing but i'm kinda excited about the concept i thought up, any feedback is welcomed :)


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